Speak to me! Let me speak to you!

What is it about needing to be understood? Communication is one of the keys to our civilization, yet we shorten and abbreviate it to the point of whole sentences consisting of one word. The power of language is one of the most compelling ever formed in mind of man, and some of the most profound, most commanding words in existence are ‘if’ and ‘just.’ So few letters, so much conveyed.

And yet, it is still so difficult to be understood some days. And it is that need, that driving force of expression realized that brings about some of the most frustrating moments of our lives. Break-ups, for example, are steeped in lack of communication. Usually, there’s too much yelling, but still amidst the breaking waves of chaos, both want to be understand by the other. Both need to be understood, because it obviously hasn’t happened yet.

Or has it? What does constitute a lack of communication?

Certainly the speaker is to blame. Not concise or vague enough. Not strong enough, too nagging, not enough words, too many words. Surely the speaker is to blame.

Or perhaps the listener? Unwilling to hear beyond what they wish, the words float across their mind in flitting specks, only the harshest or most desirable buzz words truly gaining a foothold. And then they wonder why everything falls apart, why they are being accused of not understanding what has happened and how they have trespassed. “What do you mean? I hear every word you say!” Except the words didn’t all stick around long enough to be understood in context.

I do not pretend to be an expert on communication. I have my own issues with it, usually involving interpretation of vocabulary. I was once told by my roommate that I didn’t know what I was talking about because I didn’t use the right phrasing. Right. Like it’s impossible to say that same thing 40 different ways in the English language. And like we don’t have regular communication breakdown due to word usage. Different word use does not mean the point is not the same. But one has to listen in order to make that connection. Fancy that.

Communicate comes from the Latin root commūnicāre, to impart. But in order ‘to impart’ someone has to be taking in what is imparted. Speak and listen in equal measure. Recognize it, understand it, run with it. It’s all any of us can do.

9/2/08